thoughts on pregnancy #2 (vol.1)

**disclaimer: these pics were taken 3 or 4 weeks ago - my belly seems to have doubled since then

How far along? 25 weeks (wow! when did that happen?! and this is my first real post about it...)
Maternity Clothes? pants, yes definitely. i just splurged (not really - they were actually on major sale) and got two pairs of maternity leggings. how did i not get these the first time around?? best pants ever. i still try to wear non-maternity shirts (mostly cuz i only have like 5 total maternity shirts, 3 of which i just bought last week), but they're all getting too small/short.
Sleep: i'm still sleeping pretty well. i tend to only get up once a night, probably partly due to the fact that i work late a lot of nights and don't go to bed til 1am & i'm up at 630-7am with gracie. i usually sleep pretty well during those few hours, although it is getting harder to flip myself from side to side. and my hips hurt.
Best moment this week: i asked gracie what baby sisters name is and she said excitedly "waco!". that's my brother-in-laws name ;) maybe more a gracie story than baby story, but it was pretty funny
Miss Anything? sleeping on my stomach. 
Movement: i feel her a lot more just the last week, but i still expected to feel her more/more often by now. it just hasn't been super consistent yet, i feel like, but i do feel her every day now, so that's good. she's usually always active in the evening, around 10pm or so, just like her sister was.
Food cravings: nothing i'd really call a 'craving'. i like the same things as i did the first time - turkey sandwiches, ice cream, lots of water.
Anything making you queasy or sick? not really at this point. i was definitely more sick in the beginning than i was with gracie and i've been more spontaneously sick this time then before, but i haven't gotten sick in the last couple weeks at all, i don't think.
Have you started to show yet? uhhhh yeah.
Gender: GIRL!
Labor Signs: none yet, thank goodness
Belly Button in or out? in
Weddings rings on or off? still on, yay!
Happy or Moody most of the time: i would probably have to answer moody, but that isn't necessarily pregnancy's fault. our life has been a constant up & down the last 6 weeks or so, and there's still more to come of that in the next few weeks. i'm just exhausted, let's be real. exhaustion = easily grumpy for me.
Looking forward to: the fall & cooler weather. jackets and sweaters. maybe some time to relax???


where in the world.

i probably shouldn't be writing a blog post at 6am because i'm not exactly totally awake or coherent in my thoughts or sentences, but here i am. i feel like my brain and my mind and my thoughts and my everything is going a million miles an hour in a million different directions. i feel unsettled and unsure. and tired. i feel very very tired.

for some reason that's still somewhat unknown to myself, we decided it'd be a good idea to do all of these things at once: both jae and i work full time jobs (while i also have a second PRN job), have a baby, and put our house up for sale on a whim (while still working on some finishing touches in our house and with no real idea of where we'll go). all while raising our toddler in the middle of the hustle and bustle of the busy summer months and trying to stay alive. at this point, that's about all i feel like i can do some days - stay alive.

i can't stop yawning - did i mention i was so tired?

and also - what were we thinking??!

the whole house thing has just been craziness. i started a post about it, and if the saga ever ends i'll finish the post. but basically it's been one giant rollercoaster - so great and promising one day and then super up in the air and uncertain the next. and i'm kind of really over it at this point.

and then there's work - can i just say it? I HATE WORK.

this post is feeling like a really down and depressing post. life is also really good - gracie is growing and learning and TALKING UP A STORM every day, and she is so fun and lively and a little firecracker with some serious attitude, we just can't get enough of her. also, baby SISTER (i don't think i've even blogged about being pregnant yet....hmmm) is growing and kicking and doing great, which is a HUGE relief and blessing.

i just need life to calm down a little bit. i feel like i'm at work every.single.day.of.my.life, because really, i kind of am, and it's wearing me down. i'm kind of super ready for fall, because i feel like life kind of naturally has a way of slowing down a little when september hits and a routine kicks back in that we haven't had during the summer.

and then there's this blog. i really love to blog and love keeping up on our life through these posts, but the posts are few and far between these days, and that's just how it is right now. also, my phone has some weird film/scratch thing right through the middle of the picture lens, so every picture i take with it has like a blurry spot and it's super annoying and ruins all the pictures so i rarely even take pictures on it anymore. so that doesn't help with the blogging effort either.

i guess with this post i just needed to rant and ramble for a minute.
and now, some random pictures of (you guessed it) gracie and life lately, because why not.

she put on dad's hat and picked up a bag and wanted her shoes on because she was "going to work"

i found this little gem one morning after jae had been playing blocks with gracie the night before. in case you need a translation: jae loves mh (that's me, guys) and gracie :)

helping grandma karen water her flowers

relaxing in the hammock with cousin jack.

grandma karen got a new camper tent thing and i think you can tell how gracie feels about it.

i'm not sure where she got it from, but she likes to lay back and relax with her arms behind her head. it's kind of hilarious.

we went on a date the other night, just gracie and i. we had ice cream first and then dinner ;) (see what i mean about the blurry blop in the picture? dumb.)

and another ice cream pic to finish them up.


life lately.

it's time for a little catch-up post of the last few weeks.

summer is already flying by, i mean we're days away from july for heavens sake. and it has been a HOT one lately. i don't know that i'm exactly complaining though - i mean, summer in utah is generally pretty toasty. gracie and i are trying to soak up all the sunshine and summer goodness while we can. i'm not documenting everything as perhaps i should or would want to, but sometimes life is just too fun in the moment with a toddler, it's hard to take two seconds to pull out the camera.
(ie, we've been to the pool at least once a week the last few weeks, and i haven't taken one picture while there. it's kind of become a staple of our summer so far, but i have nothing to say for it except gracie absolutely LOVES splashing and jumping off the side and it's just a good time.)

and actually, my phone camera is struggling at the moment, so that only makes it less likely that i take photos of everything. 


here are a few randoms from lately.

came out one day to run to the grocery store and found a very flat tire on my car :(
the tire place found two things stuck in it. i blame all the dang construction around right now. not cool!

i was making gracie something to eat and came out to find her, and she was just sitting on the rug reading her thomas the train book. it was just so sweet & quiet & cute. i had to take a picture. 
then i told her her food was ready and as i walked away i watched her get up, walk over to the toy/book bins, and put her book away (even in the right bin!) before coming to eat. she makes me happy.

this is a terrible picture, but i had to take it and post it. we are working on getting a walk in every day with zo (she needs to lose a few lb's), and most days, even though we go in the morning, it's still hot already and zo is totally over-heated by the time we get home, with that black body and all. as soon as we get to the garage, she plops down in that corner in the shade & gracie goes to sit by her and pat her back. it's as if she's giving her a pep-talk and telling her job well done, zo. they're funny.

just watching mom fold my laundry while i squish myself into this basket. because, why not?!

our first zoo visit this year. and this is the only picture i took. she wasn't so sure about sitting on that elephant trunk, and the sun was also blinding her. we'll take what we can get.

finally a date night for jae and i. it was simple - temple and dinner after. then we drove around for a bit with windows down, enjoying the summer evening and made a quick stop at the grocery store for last-minute sunday dinner items. i can't remember the last time we went out to dinner without gracie. and let me just tell you, it was so nice to eat my meal without little fingers grabbing or little girl yelling or jae and i taking turns to eat because we had to control the little person. 
love her, but man, that was a nice, relaxed dinner without her.

these last few are actually from our father's day celebration at my sisters house. my nephew has a drum set and gracie took a crack at it. i think it goes without saying, but she seemed to enjoy herself  ;)
(she would blink every time she'd hit a drum, it was pretty funny)


a birthday celebration in the park.

we celebrated jae's mom's birthday a couple weeks ago. it was a nice evening - we just got together at a park and all pitched in potluck-style, and it turned out to be a really fun time. i think karen enjoyed herself.

we just love karen, and gracie especially has such a great relationship with her. i don't know what we'd do without her. she takes care of us and is ALWAYS willing to step in and help out or watch gracie so we can go on a date or whatever it is. she is so good to us and we will forever be grateful for her!

here are a few photos from the fun evening. of course, i didn't get any that are actually with the birthday girl....(sorry karen!)...they're all of gracie. figures, right? she had an absolute blast.
(and those videos at the bottom!!!)

video video


lava hot springs.

we officially survived our first camping trip with a toddler. let me tell you - there were times during it that i really didn't know if we would!

we went up to lava hot springs in idaho. i knew we needed (ok, i REALLY needed) a weekend away, so i booked us a campsite a few weeks ago and off we went. i should've known from the whopping 15 minute nap gracie took on the entire drive up there that the weekend was going to be interesting.

we basically just ate, swam, hung out at camp either in the tent or by the fire or watching the river that was right next to our camp. it really ended up being a nice little getaway and something i'd do again, with a few minor tweaks.

the first night was pretty horrific. of course since it's still bright out and we're sleeping basically outside, gracie wasn't ready to go to bed until around 930 (normal bedtime is between 7-730). she went to sleep pretty quickly, as she should've since she hardly napped the whole day and spent lots of energy swimming and it was so late. but she only slept soundly for maybe an hour and then it was up and crying every...half an hour? hour? honestly i had no sense of time and no desire to look at the time to actually see how often we were getting up. she is quite a mover in her sleep normally so that mixed with the confines of trying to keep her covered so she'd be warm in a sleeping bag in between her parents in a tent........well it didn't all pan out. go figure. she kept inching her way up so her head would run into the tent wall, and she'd freak out, hitting the tent and wake up and cry and be uncovered so i'm sure she was cold. ugh it was no fun! she even ended up with about 4 little blisters on her thumb from sucking on it so much that night. that's how bad it was! at some point during the night, i was about 99% sure we'd get up the next morning and pack up and go home and say screw it to the second night. i really thought we would. but we didn't. we enjoyed our day as much as we could being fairly sleep deprived. we actually were all able to take a couple hour nap that next morning after an early morning breakfast, so that helped.

the days were fun, swimming and just being with our little family and not having any cares or time restraints or anything. i loved that part of it. the weather was a little on the cool side for most of it (of course it was beautiful the day we left), but we enjoyed ourselves anyway. the hot pools were a major bonus for the cooler weather. gracie was a very scared, very timid swimmer last summer so i was a little worried about it, but she LOVED swimming this time. totally had a blast splashing. no fear or reservations about it at all, so that was way fun.

and after all that, the second night, she went to bed again around 930, went to bed pretty quickly, and actually slept pretty solid through the entire night, hardly even moving an inch. i think she was just soooo tired. i can't complain about that. although my body is not made for sleeping on the ground, that is for sure. hello sore hips and shoulders and knees and neck and back!! good times!

it must not have been that bad, since a day after we got home, i started looking into planning our next camping trip. what am i thinking??!

a few pictures...

new elmo sippy on one side, bottle of milk on the other, toys, blankie, and shoes off...she was ready to go!

setting up the tent: all she was worried about was the (small) amount of sand/dirt on her feet. 
she's a little OCD, have i mentioned that before?

early morning play time with dad in the tent, and saying CHEESE for a picture

just some randoms from camp.


5 things & a photo.

because lists are one of my favorite things in life........

.1. i love being home during the day with gracie. i hate being gone late into the night at work. it's a constant internal battle to find the balance and appreciate it all.

.2. jae takes such good care of gracie. not that i had any doubts that he would, but i see friends that have babies/toddlers and their husbands that seem so not as "involved" as jae is, and it makes me appreciate him that much more. he does SO much, especially since i'm at work 3-4 nights a week. we're a lucky bunch of girls, gracie girl, zo pup, and me.

.3. i love spring. even when we have torrential downpours out of nowhere, like today. the hail! it was amazing! i was driving around in it today and thinking i don't even mind it's slowing me down. i'm glad it's been a rainy week.

.4. speaking of work, i just realized i never blogged about my new job. people ask me how it is, if it's better than before, if i like it, if it's all i wanted. and honestly, i'm not sure how to answer. in some ways, yes. in some ways, i feel burned out already. which is a little frustrating. but perhaps i should still write something up about the job and put all my thoughts out about it in it's own post. that might take awhile. it is what it is - a job. and jae is so great and reminded me last night when i was especially struggling, to just try to be positive. and he's exactly right.

.5. i've been super sentimental about gracie lately. today, i was going through old videos and pictures on my phone to delete some of the not so great ones and make room for...anything else (i have a lot of photos...). i just got looking through all those old pics of when she was a little one, and got all teary eyed. she is growing up into this totally awesome little girl, which i absolutely LOVE. she is seriously so much fun. but also, it kind of breaks my heart to look back and remember that little baby girl. i've decided that being a mom means that life becomes one giant bittersweet moment after another.

and for a (very poor quality) picture, because it's too awesome not to share....
jae got home from work and was feeling pretty beat, but gracie really wanted him to get on the floor and play with her. so he first sat, but then gradually made his way to laying down. and gracie continued bringing him finger puppets and stuffed animals. and he seriously nodded off for a few minutes and she continued to play around him. it was hilarious.


surprise birthday bash.

(yes, i started this post in february, and yes i'm just barely finishing it and yes i'm still going to post it anyway).

well it happened again.
we had another year go by and another birthday to celebrate!
jae's on the 21st, mine on the 22nd.
but this year, jae turned the big 30!!!

he was less than thrilled about that number. but i have a feeling it'll be a good year for him :)
i decided it was a good year to do something a little extra special for him. i've never tried to surprise him for his birthday before, so i wanted to try it! i was so nervous it wouldn't work out - either he'd find out or no one would show up or something. but it actually turned out pretty perfect and i think he really enjoyed his night, which made me super happy too :)

basically, i had one of his besties help me out by spreading the surprise info to all the other friends. i told him specifically who i definitely wanted invited, and then told him to just invite anyone else who i'd forgotten or who he thought jae might enjoy seeing. we did this about a month in advance and then another reminder the week of. i was just so worried people would forget or not show!

after throwing around a few different ideas, we ended up just meeting everyone at the Garage in SLC. yes, it's a bar and we don't drink, but we've heard rave reviews on their food, so it's somewhere we've had on our list to try for a long time. plus it was a good central location for everyone that was coming so it worked out perfect.

all i told him was that we were going out on a special date. his mom came to babysit and we headed to SLC. he tried guessing a few different places of where we might go to dinner, but he failed. just as we were about to pull up to the Garage, he guessed it and i told him yes. he was surprised, but excited.

we walked in and i kind of pulled jae behind me to the back patio (neither of us had ever been so he was kind of confused where i was going, but i just acted like i was checking out the place). we got out back and i pushed him ahead of me to the patio area and everyone was there and said surprise! haha nothing was really actually planned for that part but it turned out great and he was super surprised! yay!! there ended up being around 20 people come and i was so happy. since being  married and then having a baby, jae doesn't get to see or hang out with his guy friends a whole lot, so i really wanted to make this something fun that was all about him and something he would really enjoy doing. it was so fun for me to just kind of hang back and watch him just hang out and talk and catch up with everyone. it was super laid back and casual, which was exactly what i was going for.

and yes, after all that planning and scheming and work behind the scenes, i only took one picture the whole night. i guess that just means it was too fun to worry about pulling out the camera :)

happy 30th my love! you're amazing and handsome as ever and i love you most.

PS...i have to add these in at the bottom since they are birthday-ish related.

these were taken at our Horrocks birthday lunch. gracie with her cousin jack (who's only 9 months older than her but a giant next to her!) and her super fun uncle jaron. aren't they cute? (i realize the picture quality is pretty terrible, dangit)

for our birthdays this year, we went on an IKEA trip and bought ourselves a couple of new dressers as well as a shelf and drawers/storage for gracie's accumulating toys, books, puzzles, etc. happy birthday to us! gracie was getting sick of IKEA (it can be a rough, long trip even for an adult) so this was the only way to help her stay pleasant for the rest of the trip.

my co-workers really went all out :)

and my cute message waiting for me on the bathroom mirror. love mirror messages.